12 hysterically funny Quotes By President Robert Mugabe On Relationships

1. "It's hard to bewitch African girls these days because each time you take a piece from her hair to the witch doctor, either a Brazilian innocent woman gets mad or a factory in China catches fire."

2. "If you are ugly; you are ugly – stop talking about inner beauty because we don't walk around with X-rays."

3. "Dear sister, don't be deceived by a man who text you "I miss you" only when it's raining. You are not an umbrella."

4. "Check your girlfriend's body, if she has more tattoos or piercings, you can cheat on her. She is already used to pain."

5. "Dating a slim or slender guy is cool. The problem is when you are lying on his chest then his ribs draw adidas lines on your face."

6. "Some women's legs are like rumors, they just keep on spreading."

7. "It's better for a man to be stingy with the money he has hustled for, than for a woman to deny you a hole that she didn't even drill it herself."

8. "Some of you girls can't even jog for 5 minutes but expect a guy to last in bed with you for 2 hours??? Your level of selfishness demands a one week crusade."

9. "If your girlfriend/boyfriend has not taken a picture with you before just make that request and stop forcing Photo Grid to bring you together."

10. "God is the best inventor ever. He took a rib from a man and created a loudspeaker."

11. "Some girls don't attend the gym but look physically fit because of running from one man to another."

12. "When you kiss a girl from another nationality, do it well because you represent the whole country."